# Dealing With Negative People Made Easy

I was playing tennis today with one of my tennis buddies. We play once a week and we usually chat about work, professional tennis players and local news. Today he was very negative about the people of the area we live in. According to him they are all thieves and crooks.

Now this makes me really angry when I hear him talking like this since I have had very positive experiences with the people I have dealt with locally. I find the locals to be very friendly, helpful and considerate.

So we disagree on the facts. What can I do about his negative thinking? What can you do when dealing with negative people?

Three Ways To Deal With Negative People

1. Get specific

When someone is caught up in negative thinking they will often generalize their statements. It is a good idea to ask them questions to clarify what they mean.
For example if my friend says all dogs are aggressive I will ask him:
Small dogs or big dogs? All dogs or certain breeds? According to who? In what kind of situations?
By doing this you can shift the perspective of the negative person from a generalized over reaction to a highly specific opinion. This will ease some of the negativity and the intensity of their outburst.

2. Let Go

Let go of wanting to control the opinions of the people you deal with no matter how negative they are. By all means talk to the negative person and use your persuasion skills to help give them a more positive outlook.
However remember that each of us is entitled to be negative, wrong and inaccurate! Once you accept this you will not get so stressed about wanting to change people who are negative.
And ironically when you stop trying to change people they can almost sense that you accept them and so your words have more impact.

3. Choose to Be Positive

When people around us are negative sometimes the easiest thing to do is to join in. You do not have to. If you want to just go ahead.
Otherwise find ways to maintain a positive attitude. Look for the positives in the situation and point them out to people. Ask yourself how you can use this opportunity to become better.
And refuse to get dragged down by others into the murky waters of negativity no matter how bad it gets.
Being positive is a choice even when those around you have slipped into negativity.

By: Peter Murphy

# Jim Carey's First Check

Did you know that when Jim Carrey was young he was starting his career he wrote himself a $10 million dollar check to represent what he would earn from a movie one day? And he has since done that and more. Jim Carrey saw his success in advanced and believed, that is, had the faith to believe that he could achieve his goal.

With your goals, do you know why you've given up on your past goals that you did not achieve? Why have you not achieved them? It's one, or a combination of these factors:

You've not had the right beliefs (or patterns in your brain).
You've not had the right habits.
You've not had the right thoughts.
You've not had the right frequency.
You've not had the absolute faith and belief that you can achieve it.
You've not had the right skills or strategies.

If just one of these areas is not in place, you will find success difficult if not impossible. What are your highest impact areas? What are the most effective things you do? Everyone generally does the best they can do with what they've got at any given time-at least in the current state they are in.

You have to be totally committed to what you're doing, the thoughts you're thinking and what you're focusing on. Build the good habits and visualize the success you want as if you already achieved it. This is just like what Jim Carrey did.

Visualize your success: feel what it will feel like when the success happens. Focus on it, dwell on it, think about it, concentrate on it. Don't just picture yourself as successful, try to imagine the feelings and emotions that will come with it, such as happiness and security. Wow. You are creating patterns in your brain that will help direct you towards the people, situations and events that will help you realize your goal.

Make It Happen... If you have a cell phone (of course you do) you can use it to help you visualize your success. Most phones will allow you to program in appointments on an on-going basis. If you phone allows you to do this, why not set an appointment (or two) each day to remind you to focus on what you want, instead of what you don't want; to feel the feelings behind the achievement of your most important goals. You'll enjoy this.

By: Stephen Pierce

# Control the situation

The power of positive thinking is undeniable. Every once in a while, everyone becomes distracted, unfocused, and disheartened, especially when it seems that nothing is going your way. Now, I could let My mood and the events around me dictate how my respond and make a seemingly bad day worse, or I could harness the power of positive thinking and demand that the negative emotions I'm experiencing relinquish control over my life.

It is much easier to tell someone that thinking positive will help in a less than ideal situation than it is to actually get that individual to believe and cooperate. There have been times in my life, and maybe some of your lives too, when I did not know where the next meal was coming from or if I would return home to a cold dark house, because I could not afford the utility bill. There are far more people just barely "making it" than we would like to believe, and this is why we should practice positive thinking on a daily basis. It is about controlling your situation instead of allowing your situation to control you. When we implement a routine of daily positive thinking in our lives, we enable ourselves to mentally rise above our immediate situations. This is the first step towards actually unleashing the power of positive thought in our lives.

Once my subconscious mind becomes receptive to the practice of daily positive thinking (and believe it, there will be some resistance at first), I become more fully able to accept that Im worthy of better in life and begin to attract more positive outcomes than negative in my day to day living.

If it is difficult for me at first to allow the power of positive thinking in my life, start small. After all, I have to crawl before I can walk. Make a conscious effort to search out and look for the positive in every situation. Sometimes, depending on the situation, this may be darn near impossible, but try anyway.

Make a habit of stopping to reflect on all the positive things that happen in my life daily. It may even be a good idea to keep a journal; so that whenever Im feeling down, I can pick up my journal, read it, and reflect on the positive thoughts that I have written. Remember, it all starts with just one small step.

# Wisdom from "Someone Special"

Jerry is the manager of a restaurant in America. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would always reply, "If I were any better, I would be twins!" Many of the waiters at his restaurant quit their jobs when he changed jobs; they would follow him around from restaurant to restaurant. The reason the waiters followed Jerry was because of his attitude. He was a natural motivator. If an employee was having a bad day, Jerry was always there, telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation.

Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up to Jerry and asked him, "I don't get it! No one can be a positive person all of the time. How do you do it?"

Jerry replied, "Each morning I wake up and say to myself, I have two choices today. I can choose to be in a good mood or I can choose to be in a bad mood. I always choose to be in a good mood. Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or I can choose to learn from it. I always choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or I can point out the positive side of life. I always choose the positive side of life."

"But it's not always that easy," I protested.

"Yes, it is," Jerry said, "Life is all about choices When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people will affect your mood. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. It's your choice how you live your life."

Several years later, I heard that Jerry accidentally did something you are never supposed to do in the restaurant business: he left the back door of his restaurant open one morning and was robbed by three armed men. While trying to open the safe, his hand, shaking from nervousness slipped off the combination. The robbers panicked and shot him. Luckily, Jerry was found quickly and rushed to the hospital. After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, Jerry was released from the hospital with fragments of the bullets still in his body. I saw Jerry about six months after the accident.

When I asked him how he was, he replied, "If I were any better, I'd be twins. Want to see my scars?"

I declined to see his wounds, but did ask him what had gone through his mind as the robbery took place.

"The first thing that went through my mind was that I should have locked the back door," Jerry replied. "Then, after they shot me, as I lay on the floor, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or choose to die. I chose to live."

"Weren't you scared?" I asked.

Jerry continued, "The paramedics were great. They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the Emergency Room and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read 'He's a dead man.' I knew I needed to take action."

"What did you do?" I asked. "Well, there was a big nurse shouting questions at me," said Jerry.

"She asked if I was allergic to anything." 'Yes,' I replied. The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breath and yelled, 'Bullets!' Over their laughter, I told them, 'I am choosing to live. Please operate on me as if I am alive, not dead'.

Jerry lived thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude. I learned from him that everyday you have the choice to either enjoy your life or to hate it. The only thing that is truly yours - that no one can control or take from you -- is your attitude, so if you can take care of that, everything else in life becomes much easier.

# 7 ways to overcome any Problem

Problems are only Problems when we define them as such. They are really learning events. As the saying goes...If it doesn't kill you , then it can only make you stronger. Whenever we encounter a problem we should try to look at it indifferently. No matter how bad it may be, know for sure that 99% of Problems are solvable. When setting goals or designing a house, a blue print, a plan is needed.The same applies to Problems. We need a plan. Following are 7 ways to get out of almost any situation:

1. Accept full responsibility for the problem- accepting full responsibility for the problem is the first sign of making sure the problem gets solved. Do not blame people, events or circumstances for your situation..One way or another , your choices in life have brought you to this point. Seek to own the problem.

2. Define the problem exactly---Ask yourself: What is the problem exactly? How did it happen?Get the facts! Seek to state your problem in your own words. It helps to provide more clarity on the situation. Also ask, what else is the problem? You'll be surprised to know that what you initially thought was the problem, was in truth something very different.

3. Next ask yourself: what is the worst possible thing that could happen if this problem is not solved? Then proceed to accept the worst. Be prepared to cut your losses. It will calm your mind in such a way that you wont believe!

4. Now with a calmer mind ask yourself: What are the possible solutions to this problem? Make a list! Brainstorm! Evaluate all the possible solutions. You'll be surprised at all the answers that will come to you.

5. Choose the best solution. Then seek to take action immediately. You don't have to get it right , you just have to get it going. Be prepared to accept alternative solutions.

6. Turn over your problem to your higher power. Before you go to bed at night or before a meditation session, turn your problems over to God, the Universe, Divine intelligence or whatever you label your higher power. You'll be surprised at how many new insights you receive, especially in the morning when you wake up.

7. Every Solution has a Problem. Focus on the endresults. Focus on what you desire to achieve and not on what you don't want. Your thoughts, feelings, intentions and actions create your reality. Make sure that you are always thinking of the solution. As long as your goal is clear, those problems will vanish in thin air. Persist until you succeed!Remember .....Its just a learning event! Stop chasing Freedom......Attract it!

By: Dr. Ken Onu

# Positive attitude

There have been countless books written on positive thinking and having the right attitude and focusing on what you want. Look at bestselling books of the past 30 years like "The Power of Positive Thinking" by Norman Vincent Peale or "The Success System That Never Fails" by W. Clement Stone… it's all about your focus or your attitude or your beliefs in yourself and what you're doing. And these are the factors that make all the difference.

Let's look at it on a surface level-your attitude. If you had an opportunity to work with someone who had a good attitude or someone who had a bad attitude, who would you prefer to work with? Simple question, right? Obviously you'd want to work with the person with the good attitude.

This is how life works in many ways. People who have the right attitude tend to get ahead much faster than those who don't. Even if you look at people who are not necessarily the friendliest (one attribute of a good attitude), someone like Larry Ellison for example, who is not reputed as ‘friendly' but still, his attitude is one of a winner-he has a good attitude in a certain way. And having this winner's attitude drives people to work with him.

A Servant's Spirit

The attitude of a servant is one of commitment to providing value to other people's lives. This is one of the fastest ways to win friends, make more money and get ahead in life. If you set your focus to providing as much value you possibly can to as many people's lives as you possibly can, you will be in a fantastic position to receive multiple rewards.

It should be said that there's not much room for ego in the business of serving others. Sure, you can have a big ego and still provide massive value to people's lives. Just look at Trump, he helps provide housing for thousands of people through his building projects. Fortunately however, ego is not a requisite for success. Often times it is a barrier.

The big key is the attitude - are you in the business of providing value to others or not? If you want better results in your life, figure out how to provide more value to more people - it's just that simple and just that easy.

By: Stephen Pierce

# What are the 10 Rules of the Power of Positive Thinking?

The power of positive thinking and the top ten rules in getting it is one of the hottest topic today. This is because people are realizing that positive thinking and a positive attitude does affect life significantly. Have you heard of "The Secret" movie? It's rapidly making it's way around the world. Whether you see a glass as half-empty or half-full can affect the way you treat yourself. We are in control of our lives and our destiny.

An idle brain, is a devils' workshop they say. This is not a positive quote. However, using this ideology in mind, we ventured to write on positive thinking, so that something productive would be achieved of our minds.

Here are the top 10 Rules to Get the Power of Positive Thinking

1) Believe - You need to believe. You can not pretend to be a positive thinker. In positive thinking, you can not fake it because there is no one to pretend to.

If somebody merely believes that you are a positive thinker, how can that benefit you? The most important of the ten rules of the power of positive thinking is that you yourself should believe it.

2) Be objective - This is very important in the ten rules for the power of positive thinking. Many people tend to see their lives for their failures and thus,
they lose all hope of ever attaining in their goal. Some other people, filled with false pride, tend to magnify their success and they make all the wrong decisions.

3) Surround yourself with people who have a positive attitude - When you are engaged in an internal battle between your negative and positive self, you will need all the help you can get. Do not surround yourself with negative people who will just drag your positive attitude to the floor with their negativity.

4) Be healthy - All of the positive thinking in the world will not help you if you are six feet under, can it? You have to keep your body healthy in order to fuel your positive thinking. One step to achieving the power of positive thinking is looking after your body.

5) Switch negativity around - Remove all negative thoughts by repelling it outright when something negative enters your personality. Channel that energy into positive thoughts. Positive quotes and positive affirmations will help to keep negativity away.

6) Be patient - Positive thinking is not immediate. You need to reprogram yourself in order to get remove any negative attitude you possess.

7) Remember that other people can sense your negativity - Before you do anything, be sure to have the right attitude. One reason why people fail is because others can sense their negative attitude and want no part of it. Positive thoughts, positive thinking, and positive affirmation create a positive attitude

8) Be positive - Always look for something positive in everything new. When you encounter something unfamiliar, do not be afraid. Take a hard look at it and see it for the positive effects it brings, this will make your life easier.

9) Pace yourself - You need to pace yourself in order to prevent yourself from collapsing. Take life one day at a time. Remember that you can not hurry into being positive. Be patient and you will achieve a positive attitude.

10) Apply the change - The main characteristic of these ten rules of the power of positive thinking is the fact that they only bring you to the door. You have to open it yourself. Many individuals do not realize this, but we need these rules in order to appreciate life more. Some people think rules limit our achievements, but this is untrue. Without any rules, we would have been extinct centuries ago. Rules remove the chaos that is called life and impose sanity into it.

Rules are what we use to help us understand the true meaning of life. Sometimes, we look for rules in order to help us attain our goals. People make rules in order to help themselves achieve their goals in a manner that they can understand. Rules are also used to help us understand life. People give out rules in order to help others get what they want. We are able to keep every discovery made because of rules.

It seems that people, when looking for rules, like to stick to ten, which is a nice, round number. It comes as no surprise that individuals look for 10 rules for the power of positive thinking.

By: Christine Gray

# Setting Yourself Free in Three Quick Steps

Lilly Tomlin said, "The problem with the rat race is even if you win, you're still a rat." A lot of us are running a rat race - feeling caged into a life of running and giving to everyone else FIRST, sometimes at your own expense. We are pulled in so many different directions - work, family, finances. It is time we put our foot down and stop feeling controlled - by people and circumstance.

Well, it's time to set yourself free. Today, begin to take stock of life and decide what is most important to you. Evaluate the benefits and the losses of certain lifestyle choices. In this quest to lead a fulfilling and quality life, here is my action plan to begin to set us free.

1. Free Yourself From Negative Influences.

Have you ever been in the company of a person so negative you felt completely exhausted afterwards? Relationships with negative people can take a toll on your health, thoughts, and emotions. You will become the people you associate with.

Quick Tip: Don't allow "toxic people" to rule your mindset. Remove yourself from the company of negative people (I also call these individuals "toxic people"). If this isn't possible (for example at a family function), limit the time of your interaction.

2. Stop Putting Your Needs on Hold.

We tend to put the needs of EVERYONE - our employer, family, and friends - ahead of our own. To do this denies us the opportunity to fulfill our personal wishes, goals, and desires.

Quick Tip: Make an appointment with yourself Today. Take the time now to stop and listen to your inner voice that so desperately wants to tell you your heart's desires. Now that you know what you want - take action and make your needs a top priority.

3. Think Outside The Box.

"We can't do that! It won't work. Besides we've done it this way for the last 20 years." How many times have you heard this? We are creatures of habit and like to do things the same old way because it feels good. We love familiarity - it's comforting. Unfortunately, that familiarity, or "the box," can stifle our creative juices and rob us of great new ideas and opportunities.

Quick Tip: Expand your comfort zone and start to think outside the box. Take one thing you have done the same old way just because, and write down three new ways to do it. Take a chance. You might just surprise yourself.

Remember - Focus on your needs and set yourself free!

By: Joy Fisher-Sykes

# Developing a Positive Attitude through Declarations

People who have great positive attitudes believe in themselves. They are able to focus on opportunities not obstacles, and are persistent in finding solutions to challenges. In order to develop a more positive attitude, one needs to start by having an open mind to change. You must be willing to step outside of your comfort zone for awhile in order to grow. How could anyone expect to create positive change in his or her life if they keep doing the same non-supportive behavior over and over again? This is a perfect example of insanity at work.

Life is all about choices, whether they be good or bad. Now is the time to take full responsibility for your thoughts and behavior; stop making excuses or justifying your actions. If you truly desire transforming your life for the better, then you must give yourself permission to attract more abundance, prosperity and joy into your life. Developing positive, supportive habits through declarations will dramatically change your lifestyle and move you closer to achieving your dreams and being more successful in all aspects of your life.

Declarations/Affirmations are one tool that you can use to change your non-supporting, limiting beliefs and improve your attitude. Simply put, a declaration is a verbal statement of intention to either be or do something. To be the most effective, a declaration needs to be a positive affirmation stated aloud in a formal manner with physical actions. The more senses that you can engage in the process, the easier it will be to create permanent, positive change. As silly as this may sound, stand in front of a mirror to jest and smile as you make your declarations. Have some fun changing your mindset.

To experience true success, in all of its senses, you need a rich, meaningful, balance between your spiritual life, your relationships with family, friends and colleagues, your understanding of the world around you, your physical and mental health, and your finances and career. It is obvious that in order to achieve greater success in all aspects of your life you need to develop a list of declarations that will address each fundamental area. The following twelve declarations are designed to not only help you reach your full potential, but also to add value to other people’s lives. They enable you to pursue your higher purpose in life of making a positive difference in this world through your unique talents, skills and gifts.

1. I am richly blessed every day since my life purpose is aligned with God’s higher purpose for me.

2. I deserve to have more abundance and prosperity in my life because I add value to other’s lives.

3. I am truly grateful for all of the people, experiences and opportunities that have come into my life.

4. My legacy is my unconditional love for others.

5. I spend quality time and use effective communication in nurturing my core relationships.

6. I attract the ideal people into my life who support my efforts.

7. I am open to constantly learning and improving my mental capacity.

8. My healthy lifestyle gives me optimal physical well-being.

9. My total success attitude guides my actions to produce the results that allow me to reach my full potential.

10. I choose to create the beliefs and attitudes that support my dreams.

11. My multiple streams of income allow me to be financially free.

12. I constantly seek lucrative opportunities to leverage both my time and money.

Practice these declarations twice a day, preferably once in the morning and once at night, for the next couple of months. You will be amazed at how effective this technique is in transforming your beliefs and attitudes.

As a final note, live your life to the fullest in joy and gratitude one day at a time. Focus on the present and what you can change for the better in the moment. Keep in mind that life should be fun. Here’s to your on-going success.

By: Randall Stewart

# Energy Boosting Tips for Busy Women

Have you lost the energy that you once had in your life? Are you feeling drained at the end of the workday? I know firsthand that women need to increase their energy levels in order to get more of what they want out of their lives.

Lack of energy is the number one complaint I hear from every woman that I speak to.Years ago I taught a software training class for five consecutive days; at the beginning of the week I had high energy levels. However, by day 5, my energy was depleted--mentally, physically and emotionally. It took me two weeks to replenish my energy.

Today, I use energy boosters interspersed throughout my day to help me reclaim the energy expended so that I feel revitalized throughout the entire day. According to authors Jim Loehr, Ed.D and Tony Schwartz, who wrote the book entitled The Power of Full Engagement, "managing energy, not time, is the key to enduring high performance as well as to health, happiness, and life balance...We must learn to live our lives as a series of sprints -- fully engaged for periods of time -- and then fully disengaged and seeking renewal." In other words, if you identify and reduce stress triggers, learn to pace yourself, take excellent care of your body, set boundaries around your life and create a support system, your energy levels will increase and remain high daily.

Identify and reduce stress triggers. Stress is an unavoidable part of life. Identify the cause or circumstances of stress -- where you were or your physical and emotional state. Life events such as traffic, work and family increase stress. Find healthy ways to cope with stress. Recognize that stress depletes energy, but your reaction to it helps you minimize the impact.

Learn to pace yourself. Determine what makes you happy and give yourself what you need. Pay attention to the parts of your life that are most important. Create daily practices that nurture your ability to build energy levels--take breaks, eat healthy snacks, listen to music, and focus on the present and what's within your ability to control.

Take care of your body. Make yourself number one as a priority; spend your energy maximizing your health and wellness. Try mind-body exercises, such as breathing, meditation and yoga. Be physically active everyday and get plenty of rest. Take time to nourish your body with a massage, which releases tension, revitalizes energy, and helps you increase vitality.

Set boundaries around your life. Say "no" to things that don't support your overall priorities. Only accept requests that support you at home and in the workplace. Learn your limits--pay attention to what you can and cannot do to reduce the stress of excessive demands on your life. Make the choice not to overload your schedule.